Every time Dr. T (our pre-martial therapist) discusses our wedding ceremony with Grant & I, she talks about the importance of the people we invite. She says the people who watch us take our vows will be the people to remind us of them during difficult times ahead. They are the family and friends who will remind us of our wedding day and our choice to be united forever. This didn’t truly resonate until I had someone put me into relationship “check” this weekend.
Another very important choice I made was selecting a maid of honor. To me, it was the easiest choice I’ve made to date…my best friend, Shannon McNicholas. I’ve talked about her in past entries but just to fill you in this past weekend was her bachelorette party. It was such a fun weekend in Denver filled with laughs, cries and great walks down memory lane.
At one point Shannon turned to me and gave me the best lecture I’ve had in my life. She assured me that marriage is not going to be easy. She told me it was okay to have fears and doubts, but that she would always be there to make sure I stay on track. I swear she was two seconds away from shaking me she was so serious! (ha) We talked about how we have to stay on top of each other and check in with each other’s marriages, making sure we don’t let things slip. Shannon told me that I am making the right choice in marrying Grant and how perfect we are together.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I know that Grant is the perfect match for me. I was in no way questioning our relationship or confiding in Shannon at this particular moment. But I also know, and have known, Shannon for nearly 8 years, and hearing that from someone who knows you better than you know yourself is also very comforting. It is comforting knowing that we both have people surrounding us in support.
What Dr. T was trying to get across is that it’s tough for a marriage to survive with all the statistics against you. It’s good knowing that Grant and I are betting that things will turn out for the best, but it’s even better to have friends and family who are upping the ante.